Fountainhead Pen IV
- Operator
- Mar 4
- 11 min read
Updated: 3 days ago
Mistakes
Mistakes are always forgivable,
if one has the courage to admit them.
Auto-correctt in Word shows mistakes and format errors. The mistakes are shown underlined and a click is all that is needed to fix.
It is too forgiving of mistakes, since corrections are easy.
The underline blue are format preference though, of what is the norm, of conventional style.
Format is style.
If one clicks every underlined blue, it would be in the style of majority rules.
When I learned how to write for 2 years, practicing every day like piano lessons, I avoided the rules on purpose. I wanted to have a style all my own, and create my own format.
Wix doesn't have auto-correct, which makes it an anomaly.
A wonderful space where mistakes look the same as non-mistakes. Like life, where errors are found when one sees it, by reading again. Over and over again, until there is none that can be found.
I didn't know how bad a speller I was until there was nothing pointing it out, nor giving me a fast click correct.
Auto-correct gives a false sense of pride.
The change in evirnoment revealed that I needed to improve.
Correction is where learning comes from.
Mistakes are where one finds improvements, incrementally, by just constantly correcting without worrying or memorizing.
It happens naturally by the doing, with no passion or judgement when found, just correct it and move on.
It also forces you to reread what was written, which is another chance to refine. When I had a whole new section, there will be new errors, which means I reread the entire page to see if I missed another mistake.
Disposable writing is a work of the moment. To work on something for years, of constantly figuring out how to refine, until the best version survives, is the mountain climb to improvement.
Shows you didn't quit.
Practice makes better
Practice is the work, a byproduct of a finished piece
White Sands took me two years to write.
It taught me my style of writing, which then improved my style of thinking.
Too forgiving of a mistake will only ensure that mistake will be made again, perhaps forever.
If something is too easily forgiven, it is easily forgotten.
Experience something that repeats correcting mistakes, so you get used to feeling of correcting a mistake. Correcting a mistake should not feel like a personal attack on your identity. Don't take it personally, and just fix it.
With constant practice it becomes just a part of you.
Try to experience not being perfect, so you can improve to becomin better, which leads to Best.
Go down with humility, to rise up with strength, with a new technique.Fix your own mistakes without taking it as a personal attack on Self. When someone corrects you, you say, okay, you are rigtht and then move on. No longer the end of the world with complaints attacking or blaming. You make mistakes all the time, since now you see them for the first time, withhout auto-correct of life.
You don't forgive Self. Which improves Self.
A mistake revealed is a correct path shown. The effort to correct is where one finds character, the correct character of a mispell. The red unerline is mandatory to look and research the correct spelling, and retype.
Don't take the easy way of avoiding or excusing a mistake.
Correcting, before you even recognize, is a mistake, the error of overconfidence.
Like those hustle drills going back and forth, to build up your stamina. Correcting should become second nature. Correct before you forget, beacuse they are the hidden gems.
It is a new experience, and problem sovling, where you are the problem, is an investment.
Going back and correcting is quality.
It instills that same attitude in life.
Forgiveness of mistake should never be auto-corrected with a "sorry" or "I don't know." It makes you become false with Self, at the cost of never having to fix.
Correct
Correct before you forget
The best way to apologize is never do it again.
Correction shows that one cares enough to fix. Correction is effort that rewards, since an improvement is made.
If it is not corrected, one does not think it is worth the effort.
If you mispell a word often, sometimes you just avoid that word.
"Restaurant" is a word I mispelled for most of my life. And I used to know that auto-correct would find it and would fix it. Almost every time I got that one word wrong.
But I also noticed I didn't use that word often since I knew I didn't know how to spell it, so I used other words to avoid.
Avoidence is fear, a sign one feels danger. I was in danger of getting that word wrong all the time.
It was a fear of my own making, becasue I was lazy to ever fix it and didn't think it was worth to really learn that word.
It was comical how often I stayed away from that word because I forgave myself so easily.
It takes effort to look up and type. But that is how I learned to finally spell restaurant now, which was to finally focus correcting since I no longer had a safety net.
No auto-correct means I have to spell correctly without any assistance.
Can't rely on AI to find it.
Forgiveness shouldn't be a safety net to keep making the same mistakes.
Some things should never be auto-corrected.
Like Alpha Certain avoiding ever mentioning the 2 most traumatic experiences of my life, June 6 and June 28 of 2023..
Her format says she doesn't ever want to explain what happened.
A simple question asked by someone not me, would see immediately, she is terrified to expalin with details about those days and that is how you would know.
And then all the other stories would now become Truth. I don't lie about things that happen to me. I don't exaggerate, in fact I understate, which is my format.
Fear
Thinking will not overcome fear,
but action will.
The fear that I had when I started writing is that it would be misunderstood.
Which became a bore and obviously turned into a chore.
I began to second guess and overcomplicate.
I was letting fear control.
When I was young I went to a public pool.
They had a high dive and I jumped once.
It was an interesting experience about fear.
The thing I feared was the idea of the dive.
But once I took my first step and started climbing up, the fear lessened with each step climbed.
I was focusing on what I was doing. which was the steps.
I don't remember the dive, only the climb and the moment I reached the top.
The best way to overcome fear is the step forward.
The illusion of the certain fear was shattered.
The certainties of my mind was just an illusion of what my belief was before the experience, which was not that memorable.
The best way to overcome fear,
keep experiencing it again,
until you are present.
The doing is the knowing.
It took a lot of bad writing to finally overcome the fear of being misunderstood.
I found a solutoin.
I just wrote for myself and made it clear on the main page, misunderstanding is my style.
And then I just wrote freely without any worry,
focusing only if it made sense to me.
I don't care if anyone misinterprets it,
by not caring if anyone reads it.
Validation of others of your Art is a rookie mistake.
I learned that through painting.
Validation from others will compromise your own belief in your Art. Writing for others is needed for most, but not for this page.
It is a sketchbook of my thoughts.
The words I write are on my own interface.
Within the words are sentences that hold all my thoughts, the understanding of them make the words more powerful.
The meaning expands like a Bg Bang, since I am the creator.
A remarkable discovery every time I read my work, since it makes me figure out what I am saying, which is non-linear even to me. I have to figure it out since I write short hand to myself.
I just do, including writing. Not sure where it goes until I get there, and then I figure out during the doing.
I write the end, not knowing how it starts.
Sort of like doing, without knowing what I did until I explain it.
Painting
Painting is easy when you don't know how,
but very difficult when you do.
The first book that really taught me how to draw was Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain.
There was an excercise where you drew upside down to take the memorization of drawing out of the mind.
It prevented naming what was being drawn, since one couldn't recognize it upside down.
It was a simple way to see the Truth of what was in front of me, without uttering a word. I can't name it if it doesn't look like it.
It was a remarkable moment every time it worked, which was every time.
I drew better when it was upside down.
I never forgot that experience and I kept that habit at the age of 16. I haven't named anything since then, which makes me seem dumb..
I never memorize or even think of words when I am doing anything.
I just do.
With Excel I saw that I built programs that way that were alarming.
If I wanted it to do something, I just did it, without any concern of how and just started. I just put what was needed and slowly the program got built.
I don't think of how I do it, but look at the problem upside down, and see what parts need to be built.
I create without even bothering to explain it to myself. Wby would I, that would be weird, to narrate what you are doing while you are doing. That book showed me that words create a roadblock to seeing and doing.
Don't explain to yourself, its a waste of time during the doing.
I got into the habit of stepping forward and no longer narrating.
I just build things naturally, which is anywhere is a good place to start.
Memroziation is a bottleneck since words applied to something need an explanation.
It slows downs the mind, like honey of your words, making you certain it can't be done any faster.
The doing, without naming, makes the speed of creating go lightning speed.
Pupil
School never ends
My wife's grandson used to play this game called Poppy's Playtime 2 on my phone.
I helped him with a problem of getting past a complicated stage.
I handed the phone back and he played it from start to finish.
He said simple things while he was playing, "Go here, there, jump, then I need."
Broken sentences while he was playing a pretty challenging game. I couldn't beat it and the difficulty level was high.
He was only 7 ior 8.
He was narrating, but simplifying it since the speed of the challenges were fast, and urgency was needed. You were chased in the game.
He focused and kept starting over until he got the end.
And he got back up and tried again.
From the beginning.
When I mistype a word, I erase and type it again. Someimes if it just one letter I correct within.
The retyping is where I learn, since that is how you become a better speller. I don't memorize and just type it again. That is how I learn.
Starting over and typing it. Learning to slow down on certain letters.
My wife's grandson failed 3 or 4 times in the end boss.
I watched as his dertermination grew and he was close. I could feel his confidence build and the frustration turned to pure resolve. He was playing to win.
When he got to the end and finished it, I saw pure joy.
He accomplished something difficult and he did it all by hismself.
I was there.
I saw my wife's grandson do something that I could not do. I was overjoyed with him and he just sat there with smile all day.
He was happy.
Something he thought he couldn't do, he did.
I have those moments all the time with my interface. When I wrtie and it comes together as I envisioned it, better than what I thought, I keep that joy all day.
That is why I am happy. I createdf my won interface and I judge whether I beat the difficulty of the page.
He was my only pupil and I wish I had more opportunites to make him believe in himself.
He is so talented, just needs to beleive in himself.
To do that, he needs to get back up and keep trying, and find something he doesn't need on someone's interface.
Create your own so it continues to challenge you.
Non- Linear
I have to follow my instinct and intuition and curiosity.
When I was trying to figure out Philsophers Stone code I had a failed approach.
It was too complciated to maintain so I never used it.
What was startling to discover though, was how fast I created it.
I didn't know I worked it out in my head without ever once explaining what I was doing.
I already know while I was working.
The example below shows how my mind works.
Author's Notes:
So my first attempt was giving values to the letters.
A=1
B=20
C=300
D=4000
Duplicates are valued at 0.
Then a sum of ABCD.
If sum = 4321 that would mean there are no duplicates. ABCD
If sum is 0320 that would be BC
If sum, is 4001 that would be AD
I only tested it up to 987654321
It was too linear a solution and too complicated, but it was a creative approach.
I never used this code but what I learned was I think in reverse without even thinking.
Take the letter I
With I being 900000000 from ABCDEFGHI.
9 is on the farthest from I.
Think of it this way
9817654321 = IHGFEDCBA
But the way I wrote the formula is
980000000= AB
I wrote writing every possible solution and moving it down to the duplicates removed.
Opposite ends.
I wrote the code without even shifting gears of going into reverse.
I didn't slow down when I wrote out the formulas.
I was shocked I did this when I saw my explanation....I never knew that about myself.
I create instinctively without worry of how and but just do.
The speed of thinking is slowed down
by trying to figure things out by explaining.
That made me see that complicating with words is the bottleneck to doing something, which I never do anyway, but it explains what I am fast. I don't even slow down and keep it moving.
Any task with memorization I do poorly. I don't learn from those things, and I forget immediately. It is too lmited with the reward, a specialist memory for 1 task only.
