Eternal Black Sky I
- orphan
- Mar 21
- 14 min read
Updated: 5 days ago
"I will find my place in this world, and make it my own." said the orphan
Family
Family is not an important thing. It's everything.
The orphan was only with his Choson family
for 1 year, before she dropped him off
at a police station
The Mother left the quiet child to be found
near the entrance, and walked away
under the shadow of the Eternal Black Sky
The modern Choson Eve made the decision
of her own Free Will,
a choice that her son was better off on his own
The Ancient Khan Ancestors asked for Council
They felt this was too Great a Shame
The Ancient Ancestor, an unknown Father,
of the orphan's broken lineage of the Plains,
was allowed an ask
The Father asked Destiny,
"I ask that you guide the Child of Fate
to a better path"
When asked by Destiny the price,
he said without hesitation
"I swear on my Name, he is worth the ask"
"He is a True Son of the Plains"
"A Dragon of Blue Winter"
"This Child of Fate
will be able to repay my claim"
"I will claim him as my Firstborn"
"I will mend his Name
to the broken line of Khan"
Destiny could not refuse such a price,
and blessed the newly formed
Dragon of Blue Winter with a better path
The Dragon of Fire would be reborn again
in his season of Autumn under the Desert Sun
The Khan ancestors watched over him,
but none could teach him
the ways of the Plains
The child was on Eastern Shores,
far away from the golden fields
of his ancestral home
The True Son of the Plains
did not know the prayers
Destiny shaped his fate with a path
that led to the 3 Matron Mothers
From the Void of Nothing,
during the bumpy car ride
to the orphanage,
a voice echoed
"Do your best son, that is all I ask of you"
The choson born son no more,
the Firstborn of Khan smiled warmly
and closed his eyes
The orphan returned to his Dream Eternal,
the only place where his Ancient Ancestors
could speak to him
Blue Family
The strength of a family,
like the strength of an army,
is in its loyalty to each other.
I can only recall the briefest of memories.
But what I can remember is an overwhelming sense of Blue Winter.
Frozen memories of crystalized moments in time.
That period of my life is imprinted inside me,
forged from experiences at the orphanage,
and will always remain.
It is a past that does not haunt me.
A blue flower that blooms in the desert is a survivor, because it withstood the test against an unforgiving terrain.
As I look back to my past, sadness was reborn from winter into spring.
I survived without any bitterness, because of a child that endured.
I think of the orphan more these days.
He had to endure the test of waiting all his life.
It was the weight of a Mountain.
Each day, imprisoned within gates that did not protect, but kept him locked in.
He had no Free Will.
I remain hopeful always, so he must have kept that hope safe.
The orphan thought of the family that left him, because I think of them from time to time.
He endured and never felt let down, since I have never felt let down.
The past and present can shift back and forth, through the fabric of memory.
And this I know, the orphan's spirit was never broken.
I am full of Eternal Hope.
I have forgiven my Korean family, choices made were out of my infant hands.
I do not know, and with family, you always give them the benefit of the doubt.
They are still family to me.
They did their best, and I match their best with my best.
I endured without any resentment towards them.
I don't dwell.
I move on.
I could not have survived those long years without a family,
to keep the hope that was tested every day.
Family can be created from necessity.
They kept me warm and prevented the frostbite of bitterness.
Dance of Destiny
The only way to make sense out of change
is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.
Destiny led the orphan to a safe place
The orphan was given a cruel destiny at first,
but the dance led to a better dance
The Choson Mother treated the orphan
as second born,
even though he was a Firstborn out of wedlock
The Dance of Destiny led him to 3 Kind Mothers
that followed the ways of the One Buddha
The unknown Father, Ancestor of Khan,
now sitting at the head of council,
said without passion
"I have claimed the Child of Fate
as my Firstborn"
"His broken lineage is mended,"
"He is now accepted
into the Tribe of the Eternal Blue Sky"
"I claim him as a True Son of the Plains"
"A Dragon of Blue Winter"
"I break the line of his choson lineage"
"The Shame was too Great"
"The tribe of choson are no longer welcome"
"From this day forward
the Tribe of Khan will watch over him"
And thus, the choson ancestors could not protest,
and walked away in disgrace.
The Shame was too Great.
The Khans welcomed their Firstborn
as their own,
with the blessing of the Eternal Blue Sky
But the price to repay,
for such an honor,
was great
The Child of Fate now had to match his best
with the best of the unknown Ancestor Father
That was the price of the ask to Destiny
The Father was unconcerned
He expected the boy to match his best
and grow stronger
The Father knew that hardships
would test his weakness,
and if he did not break,
it would turn into strength
He did not think his son would break
Blue Mountain
In the depth of winter I finally learned,
there was in me an invincible summer.
I do not recall speaking Korean.
I think it was because I did not speak often.
My memory of the orphanage is a silent movie.
I have no memory of any cruelty done to me.
I felt safe there.
But my gaps of memory meant I lived the same routine.
The orphan endured the same day continuously.
He waited for 5 long years.
He did not realize the burden was the weight of a Mountain.
I experienced 12 days of what the orphan endured in 2023, and it almost broke me.
Those 12 days opened the fabric of memory to the orphan,
a past I rarely thought of, until I walked out the gates.
The orphan lasted over 1500 days and was unbroken.
He carried a burden without any family.
The orphan carried it all alone.
He didn't know the weight was so heavy and just endured.
It was all that he had ever known.
That was how he carried the Blue Mountain of my past.
Prime Law
"No retreat, no surrender; that is Spartan Law"
The Firstborn son of a Khan
was raised with discipline instilled
Raised by kind strict Matron Mothers,
surrounded by brothers and sisters,
he was taught three things.
Patience
Obedience
Compassion
The orphan stood guard mentally prepared,
to wait for as long as needed
Wait
Obey
and do your Best
His mind was trained
to accept the stillness of time
His life was just 3 rooms.
He slept on the floor
The Khan Ancestors told him
in his Dream Eternal
"Trust only the family you know"
"Find shelter under the Roof of the World"
"But never pray to the One Buddha"
"You are a True Son of Plains"
"Our people pray to the Eternal Blue Sky"
When the orphan took Winter Baths,
the water was always cold
Bathed with harsh brushes
that made his skin red,
it was the bath that caused the most pain
Before each cold Winter Bath,
a bow to Buddha
As he stepped out of the Pool of the Immaterial,
he bowed again in thanks for the Test
The Child of Fate held onto one thing
that could not be forced
He would follow all the rules
and do what was asked
But he refused to pray
His only Free Will that remained
The orphan believed in one thing
"I believe in only myself"
As his belief in himself grew,
the boy refused to feel the pain
of the Winter Baths
The suffering had been stilled
The Child showed his resolve
to even those that tried to shelter him
His Ancestors were forced
to only watch over him,
but never allowed to protect him
The Child of Fate would not ask
His steel would not bend in his beliefs in himself
Even Destiny could not shape his fate easily,
for his Fate grew stronger
the longer he accepted his fate
The devout 3 Mothers,
who gave him shelter
under the Roof of the World,
could not make him believe in the One Buddha
They knew a true follower
He was not one
The Child of Fate accepted everything
and was not attached to the suffering
As he was taught by the One Buddha,
for whom he refused to pray to
Blue Comfort
Very little is needed to make a happy life;
it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking,
I know who I am.
I did not want to bow to the statue of Buddha after I was given a harsh bath.
But they made me practice their religion, and I accepted.
I would later go through the same trial with the Romans.
I did not want to go to church, but it continued my education and tempered my stubbornness.
I respect the religions I was asked to follow, but I have never believed.
I don't retreat or surrender.
I don't give my beliefs away.
I know myself and I know what is best for me.
I don't give ground when something is important to me, and it always shocks those that see my steel resolve.
That is me.
That is who I am.
I rarely have to show that side because I am easy going.
I usually don't care enough to disagree.
Don't know, don't care is my attitude towards life.
I don't get that worked up.
It makes my life simple.
These are the 3 things I follow as prime rules.
Do not complain.
Do what is asked.
Do your best.
But not for everything.
Some asks will be denied, without any concern of compromise.
My past will never leave me because they have value.
Sad experiences contrasted with joy, makes sadness less.
Joyful experiences contrasted with sadness, makes the joy more.
It is the contrasts that reveal,
reflections of opposites,
which bring clarity to both.
My past gave me a range of experiences.
Those memories are touchstones to who I am.
It is a part of me that I do not deny or am embarrassed about.
My time in the orphanage was the best education I could have asked.
It taught me to be grateful for everything I have and made me unattached to the material.
I was raised in a spartan environment.
The only touch of modern was the TV.
But the feeling I always get,
when I think back on the orphanage,
I lived in a different time period.
When I first came to the States, my family had to place boards on the side of the bed.
I would be found sleeping on the floor in the morning.
Comfort had to be forced on me.
I would just take my blanket and sleep on the floor.
When my family told me I needed to stay in bed, I rolled off the bed on purpose, and hoped they would allow me stay on the floor.
The bed was too comfortable.
Comfort is what made me uncomfortable.
Dragon Reborn
"When it comes to luck, you make your own."
The Celtic Mother,
who practiced the Roman Ways,
was given a sign
During a sermon,
the monk spoke of giving help
to those abandoned
The Celtic Mother and Roman Father
decided they found a purpose
Of their own Free Will,
they chose to shelter a child
that had no family
The Celtic Mother asked her only son
if he wanted a brother or sister
Without hesitation he replied,
"I want a brother"
Destiny said,
"The Child of Blue Winter
has waited long enoug."
The Great Shame was now balanced
with Great Kindness
The Khan Ancestors rejoiced
And so, the Dragon of Blue Winter
entered a plane,
with an Eve to watch over him
The True Son of the Plains
flew across the Great Ocean
and left the Eastern Lands,
farther now from his ancestral home
The golden fields would have to be found
within the Eastern Coast of New Rome
Where the crest of the 9th Army
was found within a young nation
The Child of Fate would always be on foreign soil,
destined to always be a foreigner
He would be an outsider,
to both the western and eastern lands
While the child slept,
he heard a new voice in his Eternal Dream
The unknown Ancestral Father
spoke to his Firstborn son
He spoke to him for the first time
"You are a True Son of the Plains"
"We are Nomads"
"Wherever you go, that is your home"
"We pray to the Eternal Blue Sky"
"We pray to our own people"
"You are a Dragon of Blue Winter"
"Find your own Destiny"
"We will follow wherever you lead"
"Do your best son, that is all I ask of you"
Winter had ended and would never return
Spring would be the longest season
to balance the harsh cold
The Dragon of Blue Winter no longer,
reborn as the Dragon of Jade Spring
36 years of Good Luck would be given
Followed by the Desert Sun
of the Empress who imposed her destiny
The Dragon of White Summer,
of 6 years of Missed Fortune
where he would learn to serve
an eve that imposed her will on him
The child would always be a Child of Winter,
the weight of the Blue Mountain was too great
The season changed just in time
The Child of Winter almost broke
He could not have made it another year
The orphan would have lost hope,
if not for the great kindness of a family
who followed the Roman Ways,
and made a choice of their own Free Will
The Child of Fate smiled
as he flew through the sky,
flying towards his Destiny
New days were happening
The speed was too much for the quiet boy
He had to catch up with the pace of change
He was raised in the ancient ways,
under the Roof above the World
When he stepped outside the gates,
he walked into a different Time
His stillness had to match
the speed of the modern
The world was moving towards him,
and not away
On his first night on Western shores,
he crawled into a bed above the floor
His older brother taught him his first word
"Apple"
The Child of Fate was delighted
to learn the word so quickly
The firstborn marveled at the speed he learned,
and later remarked to his Mother and Father
"He learns fast"
Beauty of Eve
The soul that sees beauty may sometimes walk alone
I have a memory of all the Eves crying as one, probably the worst memory I have.
I remember getting my hair shaved with Eves mourning the loss of their hair as I heard the buzz of the clippers.
I think there was a lice breakout.
All the children had to get their head shaved.
This was a break in the pattern.
This is the only memory of this happening.
I can't recall Eves ever being at the barber shop, except this one time.
All the Eves cried and sobbed in unison.
Their one beauty of being an Eve was being taken away.
I understood, even at that age, their hair meant more than just their beauty, it was their dignity that was being harmed.
When my wife's sister was getting chemotherapy, she knew it was going to happen.
Her hair was going to be lost.
She asked my wife to brush her hair.
She said, "Please help me brush my hair one last time."
"I need my big sister to do this one last thing."
"I need your help."
My wife told me this story.
She told me that her heart ached to hear those words.
She said to me,
"I have brushed her hair countless times, Mark."
"This was the last time I would do this."
"My heart ached when she called me big sister."
Her sister asked because she trusted her, to be able to see her beauty, without her hair.
It was a sign of unconditional trust.
My gift of unconditional trust to my wife
would not be returned with such kindness.
Last Bow
Three things cannot be long hidden:
the sun, the moon, and the truth.
The Child of Fate found his hope answered
The one thing he waited for,
the hope he kept,
was finally given
He was allowed Free Will
The Winter was over,
the bitterness did not touch his soul
He could breath from the suffocating routine
He did not break from the montony
and kept his mind active
within the stillness of Time
He was given moments of privacy
His family allowed him space to be his own
They gave him Time to find out who he was
It was the greatest gift for the Child of Fate
to be able to find his destiny on his own
The Child of Winter was taken by hand
to a place with newness in his first month
It was a new experience that left him untouched
The desire of the material was barren,
it could not reach him as he walked.
His only thought was holding his Mother's hand
He was happy
And then it happened
A Break in the Pattern
He did not let his Mother move forward
The Celtic Mother,
who followed the Roman Ways,
looked down at his son
and saw a show of Faith
It was a bow to a statue of the One Buddha
The bow said
"I am grateful for everything you taught me"
"I have learned the ways of the Staff and Shield"
It was a final goodbye
It was the first bow
that was not before the Winter Baths
It was the last bow
that was in thanks for the Test
It was the last bow he would ever make
until his season of Autumn
But the Dragon of Fire still would not pray
My First Eve
Since love grows within you, so beauty grows.
For love is the beauty of the soul.
My First Eve is the first and only memory of someone my age at the orphanage.
The other orphans are faceless.
All I know was they were there.
They are just vague ideas that I was not alone.
In my clearest, crystalized winter memory of the orphanage, frozen in time, I am always alone.
In all my memories but one.
My First Eve.
She is the only one I can remember with clarity.
She could not bear the loss of her hair.
I heard her crying through the night.
She could not overcome her grief.
She walked across to the other side of the room towards me.
Eves and adams were separated on different sides of the room.
She was holding back her sobbing while she walked.
She asked me, without words, for help.
I allowed her into my space.
She slipped underneath my blanket.
I didn't say anything.
I just held her.
This memory stayed with me, because it is the only memory of contact with someone.
I knew that she did not want to talk.
It would have woken the others.
I hugged her, to let her know she was not alone.
We both slept as two orphans,
hoping to be taken away to another place,
where the cost of medicine
would have prevented unnecesary hardships.
The water was cold in the baths because hot water was too much a cost.
I had to endure the cold Winter Baths, even when it was not winter.
By the time I woke up she had returned to her bed on the floor,
so as not to get in trouble from breaking a rule.
Lineage
Reference used 22+1 and me account.
I am 100% Korean, born in Seoul.
My paternal-line ancestors with the tribe of Khan.
"Genghis Khan, the Mongolian conqueror that lived from 1162 to 1227 CE, was likely a member of haplogroup C-M217, and may be responsible for the spread of one of its branches. Half of a percent of all men on Earth, and 8% of men in the region reaching from northeastern China to Uzbekistan, may descend from Genghis Khan. His lineage is most common in Hazara, Mongolian, Uygur, Chinese Kazak, and Inner Mongolian Han populations."
My maternal-line ancestors possibly Tibetan or regions near Himalayan Mountains
"Origin and Migrations of Haplogroup M9
Your maternal line stems from an old offshoot of haplogroup M called M9. All the members of M9 descend from a woman who lived nearly 40,000 years ago. The world's tallest mountains are the heartland of M9, which reaches levels of about 10 percent in the Tibetan population. It appears to have originated about the time people first inhabited the high-altitude plateau north of the Himalayas between 35,000 and 45,000 years ago.
M9 can be found at trace levels throughout eastern Asia, an indication that it was carried far from its likely origin either in the Himalayan region or in southeastern Asia. M9 has been detected at 2.4% in the Japanese population and 3.1% among the Koreans. It is also found in a few Siberian populations."
Passion South
